Let’s talk about relationships . . . of the dating variety.
I’m probably way behind the curve on this one, but guys really do think, act and operate differently than women. Each has basic needs which are on complete opposite ends of the spectrum from each other.
How about an example?
I’m in a large crowd of people. Here’s me thinking to myself.
What would make you feel special in this situation Alex? I know! I would feel special if Kara (my first crush back in 2nd grade) would walk over and stand next to me. Yeah, that would be amazing! Since that’s what would melt me, that has to melt her. So let me go do that right now. Let me go stand next to her. She’ll think I’m pursuing her. Score. I’m going to get a bonus kiss tonight!
Go ahead. Ask about that bonus kiss. Not so much. More like a bonus door in the face. She didn’t pick up what I thought I was putting down.
That’s just the tip of the iceberg.
The differences in all aspects of human functioning are dramatic. I love Jesus and I wouldn’t lie to you. ;)
You can’t operate under the assumption that what you like, she likes. What you need, she needs. What you see, she sees. What you put down, she picks up.
Save yourself some frustration and do some reading. It will go a long way in developing an understanding of the opposite sex, their unique needs and how to communicate effectively.
A few book recommendations.
- Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
- For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn
- For Men Only by Jeff and Shaunti Feldhahn
Love and Respect is broken down into three parts. Read the first part carefully (the Crazy Cycle is dead on) and skim the last two parts of the book. In my opinion, the last two parts of Love and Respect can be substituted with the For (Wo)men Only books. Regardless if you are a guy or girl, read both For Women Only and For Men Only.
I’m not sure what you would be if you’re not a guy or girl, but whatever . . . ;)